dude, wtf is with her now? she has stuff up about how i am kicking her while she's down
wtf? who are you bitching about me to now?
Single schmingle. No one actually obeys the relationship boundaries these days. Its 2009.
So I feel really bad about last night...can i give you a blow job and we call it even?
I envy you so much. I get girls who pee on my floor and you get girls who leave in the middle of the night
sitting alone on a bench with a sombrero and a bottle of vodka. really angry i got here before you guys.
Your "dubstep at ceilis" resulted in a random naked guy busting into my room and peeing all over my bathroom
We have a little not a lot. We already rolled a blunt and named him Ron.
Get over here asap there are three naked girls two bottles of whiskey and only one of me
She's just a lonely cunt and i hope she stays that way for the rest of her fucking life.
This seems like an over reaction to someone eating your fries.
You hit your head and proceeded to fall in the floor, curl up in my lap and make me rock you like a small infant. I was beginning to worry until you started to sing "Rock me momma like a wagon wheel".
Theres just something about today that says lets get drunk, dont you think?
I'm keeping him.
Sex was good?
I had to tap out three times. There aren't words for how much better than "good" that is.
I just woke up, its 6AM and i'm pretty sure the guy passed out next to me is 70% ugly...
I just apologized to a wet floor sign i walked into.
Only you would make Mario Party a contact sport.
And you owe me a new pair of switch controllers.
Randomize
