Culvers...So Good
So good. The butter burgers slip right outta my ass.
I just want to sing "highway to the danger zone" when I'm taking his pants off.
I'm buying this stripper a house, I don't care what her name is.
no. you can't hotbox the world.
We have nothing in common but the sex rocks, would it be awful to develop a drug habit just to have a topic of conversation?
we just watched the ball drop on the spanish channel. best mistake of my life.
Do you remember using the heel of your shoe as a shish kabob stick? You offered me some chicken, but I declined.
Sorry I fell asleep again. I'm in the shower now. Door is unlocked. Condoms are in my desk. I want your game face on for when I get out.
who am I kidding I don't have any dignity. Plus we're not doing a porno, we're just doing random things naked
My mascara kind of smells like tequila to me...Is this my body crying for help or asking for a shot?
I banged a guy named Robbie last night and in the middle of sex he begged me to scream santos. I'm pretty sure I just screwed a dude with multiple personalities.
so... i have a picture of you and three other girls making kissy faces at this giant stuffed banana you're holding. however, you seem to be violently screaming at it.
Those bitches did NOT have my back.
Have you ever wanted to murder the Sun? To bring the life-giving fusion reactor to a bitter end because of the sheer agony it brings to your eyes as it keeps you awake. And for waking the birds. Fuck birds.
Sex was followed by homemade breadsticks. I waited till after the breadsticks were gone to tell her i had a gf.
No I'm not lying to you. I'm just not telling you the whole story. There's a massive difference.
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