remeber the saying "bad choices make good memories" dude our bad choices dont even make memories.
He gave them shots of purell and called it "acid rain" jello shots. They took them.
I hate freshman.
She got a digital picture frame for her birthday. FINALLY - a place for me to sneak all those penis shots I've taken with my iPhone.
get over here now. the boys are doing shots of everclear, chasing with monster, and some dude jsut walked in with a backpack full of tattoo gear.
you're being fucking weird and i don't like it. text me when you're not being the after picture on a poster for rehab
I ate all his french fries. He was no longer useful to me.
I'm really glad that we can be casual hook up buddies. This is a true friendship. Now, please convince your roommate to do the same. Thanks.
I've slept in a different bed every day this week. Operation Ho Ho Ho is a success!
I was like can I please fuck your hips back into realignment
Bro if you were a bird I would puke in your mouth right now
Or I could hide in your trunk so you can sneak out of putt putt for sex breaks
Hungover playing piano at a baptism I am the PICTURE of class I feel like I should be struck by lightning
I don't know how to reply to him. 'I'm glad the ecstasy my friend tricked you into taking wore off'...? It just doesn't seem sincere
I'm getting "congrats on your engagement" shots. I need to get engaged more often!
Im playing a game I have to take a drink every time my gram asks me the same question hammered by 4 guaranteed...
Randomize
