I decided to name my penis gatorade...is it in you?
Unmistakable female orgasm noises coming from upstairs shower
She must've brought a toy -- seriously doubt that he's up to the task
I didn't think it was possible for the human body to be physically dependant on weed until I moved in with this kid
it looked like a condom graveyard when i woke up. they were everywhere
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
we've decided to start cutting you off when you can't figure out how to work an ipod.
Saw a guy throw up on himself while walking, drinking, and singing all at the same time. Hope your night is going better than his :)
Come over. We have tacos... And girls who took their clothes off. But mainly, tacos.
Based on the grey fur I pulled from my teeth, I think her vagina has mice.
Please tell me that I didn't call you to say I was swimming in outter space
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I apparently pulled his dick out at the bar and started yelling "DICK PICS IN REAL LIFE!"
I just got high and swiffered the bathroom floor....2 for 2 on brilliant life ideas
I've had to take two showers today and it's not even 1 o'clock. Why won't this weekend wash off?
There is a dude riding on one of those standing wheel things inside forever 21. Calm down.
I will take a ruler to your dick so help me god
As soon as you told us you were an ostrich with a big penis, we began to wonder what you were on and if you wanted to share.
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