But like now everytime I pee I just think... wow I had sex with him on this toilet.
now were playing what girl doesnt belong in the picture of girls in bikinis.
On a totally unrelated note, captain four hour sexcapades lost it in his boxers this morning and tried to pretend it didnt happen. Lmao
I have their Unicorn picture in my shirt, and I just threw a Bud Light Platinum bottle through their window. We need to go now.
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Does he cat effect his dick pics to you? Because THAT is true love
Donating $10 to Sandy victims for every hurricane I drink tomorrow. Buying me alcohol just became a good cause.
Is it rude to ask for an autograph after giving him a blowjob in their hotel's hot tub?
Was there a condom involved? Because he was saying he wanted a kid. Repeatedly.
We just got home a lil bit ago. No sorority girls showed except the ugly swimmer chick and she asked if I've ever faked an orgasm.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
YOU TRIED TO SWIM IN HER FISHTANK. I don't think she's going to call you.
The only downside to doctor sex is that getting choked with a stethoscope leaves marks.
There aren't enough words in the English language to fully describe how worried I am for your dick. And the rest of you, I suppose.
Just for the record, I did not have sex in your bed. Happy 4th of July.
He was really cute! And I know but it's just like getting my fix ya know? He's basically a human vibrator.
he just asked me that if he was a penguin and I was a penguin if I would fuck him
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