I just used Master P to describe what sound the letter U makes to my daughter...
plus shes a stripper, ive been with strippers, if you fuck this up your penis will never forgive you
Just tell your wife to stay in the car because you are self conscious about drinking infront of her. Now you have a DD AND we can still have a good time.
What time did you start drinking?
Maybe.
Maybe isn't a time...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I want to die. Marc and I were making out in the hallway and fell into a fire hose in a glass case. It shattered everywhere. Everyone thought we fell out a window. I think I have glass in my back. Awesome.
sounds like it. if it makes you feel better i blew up a $75000 farm tractor last night.
My cab driver has a hooker in the front seat. Really, this is serious. And weird.
She clicked her fingers, said "here boy!", and pointed at her vagina.
Pretty sure I humiliated the fuck out of myself last night after I was dared to attempt to give myself head. I hate vodka
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
i want to have his babies. i NEED to. shit i wont even ask for child support, he's that goodlooking.
The owner was showing me around and pointed at one of the bars and said "this is the one you're allowed to dance on. I could tell you wanted to ask." DREAM JOB.
I just found one of your beard hairs in my oatmeal.
I swear, the guy behind me wasn't paying attention until the words "middle aged fuckboy" came out of my mouth.
she stuffed her marc jacobs purse full of cereal
classy
Before making travel and hotel reservations to meet your "affair" for the first time, consult your menstrual calendar! $633 wasted!
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