Well that's not true. She had two social skills. She kept them in her bra
My cousin's wedding had personal beer funnels for each table and a drinking game against the bride and groom. im sorry for ever calling you white trash
Put your dick on his face to wake him up, dont worry its fine.
You should seriously consider super glueing your knees together
The power of my vagina can withstand any attempt of celibacy
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
we convincced her parents we were only wasted meanwhile theire faces were morphing into one and i swear there was a reindeer in the background
I think, at this point, getting pissed and declaring my love via reality TV would be an improvement
Today's been pretty great, I went and bought the new Batman for the sole purpose of masturbating to Bane
His penis could choke an elephant. A baby elephant... But an elephant non the less.
Have bite marks on my arm where my temporary tat was Saturday night. Did someone try to bite Captain America or something?
One of the many mysteries surrounding the weekend...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
we could do so many fantastic illegal things together. sexually and otherwise.
I was a plus one at an intervention for a person I didn't know.
I put purple lights under my bed and asked him if he wanted to fuck in a spaceship.
Do him. As soon as possible and as often as possible. That's what Oprah would say
Can you masturbate to someone liking your instagram picture?
Im so drunk and the cops showed up so i ran on all 4's through the woods because i had no shoes hoping they would mistake me for a fox
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