A 21st bday and NYE should be illegal to have in the same week...
becoming an adult blows. i don't think its possible for me to wake up for anything that doesn't involve kegs and eggs or half naked bums passed out in our yard.
Jus posted an album so big that it takes my manhood into question
I wasn't sure if "you're even prettier in the dark" was a compliment. Hmm.
well judging by the amount of dired blood around my nipple rings i'm gonna assume it was a good night
she told me to hold the wheel while she hung out the sunroof and cursed the old lady behind us out.
When he pulls out of you and farts and says ahh I wanted to do that for the past 30 mins ....you rethink the next drunken hook up
A guy is going to be inside me and I'm gunna start singing "I am stuck on your penis, cause your penis is stuck in meeee!"
I may or may not be wearing slippers and a TMNT hat. This thing better not have a dress code.
We were fucking while the tv was on, and one of those animal cruelty commercials came on. We then switched over and started doing it doggy style. It was then that I realized that I'm going to hell.
New life goal: fuck in the shopping cart
It will be too late. I will have fornicated with the enemy by then.
Nothing says I love you like a silicone dragon dick
I feel a blackout coming on
Plz don't have me burst into your house saying you're late for re airport to rescue you from a fat girl again
That was 2 times
OMG OMG OMG!!!! I made his penis bleed!! I repeat I MADE HIS PENIS BLEED!!!!
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