So she is eating her margarita with tortilla chips....like using her chip as a spoon
We're doing a case race on Saturday.
I'm in. I'm currently drinking a beer in the bathtub so I guess I can consider this "practice" and not just "alcoholism"
We were driving to the party as he was giving me key bumps.. That's what I call team work
I don't think my arm is broken I can still text
the outcome of this sandwich determines whether or not i do anything else with my day..
I am the sex elephant in the room. Again.
You're always so generous when it comes to your dick.
I think this is the rare instance where the babysitter should get sex as payment from the person being babysat plus you'll get birthday sex. It's a win-win.
I know what you meant. If you want babies in time for your birthday, we gonna need either a time machine or a ski mask.
Speeding home on my break at work because I forgot to grab my Percocets that I have because getting through work sober's too hard
He asked me for a pic so I sent him a pic of my boyfriends dick.
alright well Taco Bell Closes at 12 so you better pray to god she's asleep by then or I'm running in your house butt ass naked with a bag of tacos
Just had a threesome for the second time in my life. I don;t even enjoy threesomes. Too much effort.
HOW DO THESE THINGS KEEP HAPPENING TO YOU?
You've reached your one pic per night limit. To increase your limit, start conversations before 9 and submit your request for an additional pic before 10.
idk he wanted to trade sex for a triple order of hashbrowns
AND YOU SAID NO?????????
Randomize
