at some point to night u and I have a 'meeting' too...(1-737): I hope so
it felt great physically, but AWFUL morally.
i wouldnt be suprised if in indian your name meant "walking lie"
we're ranked number 5 for having the most pot in the country for a university school. idk if i should feel worried or just plain blessed.
they duct taped my keg cup to my hand with my sister's phone number on it. I should be ok tonight.
DONT TAKE THE KEG OUT OF THE HOT TUB I NEED A PICTURE OF ME DOING A KEG STAND ON IT
all i remember is that her bootyshorts said 'shameless' and that there was no turning back.
It's the eternal vodka... it never seems to go away
Also I'm very proud of th fact that I walked my dog before bed. Drunk dog walking should be an Olympic sport; it takes SKILLS.
Dude. It's not even nine. I don't know yet.
Drink number four. Don't even tell me about its not even nine
He barged in the room with no shirt on, all fucking ripped with a half keg under one arm. Sara now calls him Bronan the Beerbarian
Yeah, you gave me a condom that I 100% coulda used, then an hour later you basically beat the shit out of me and physically took it from my pocket.
It took me three days, but I managed to nearly get arrested on my way out of LA. Made it to the airport. Crisis averted, though. The real crime is, my flight is delayed two hours.
Would you be opposed to me keeping a live lobster in the shower for a bit?
Slowly dying because of my period and my phone is mocking me because I have 69% battery
Randomize
