i mean i cnt help that this campus has the highest STI rate
i'd rather walk the sahara in a snuggie with no water than take a bicycle cab
Its trashy in the best of ways. Like a stripper working to pay for college.
he just asked me to email him a handle of captain morgans...how sober do you think he is?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Why hello there Olivia! How are you today on this fine and most wonderful morning full of magic and adventure and awesomeness?
Someone just got laid.
There's a person in my phone named motor boat. I love making new friends.
High Amy loves you. Sober Amy is unsure, but she's not here so fuck that bitch.
You were pouring Patron into the window of the squad car trying to get the police dog to drink it
So thats why that cop beat my ass?
Probably
Are you high?
The snorkel mask makes that pretty clear
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He told me he loved me. I didn't know what to say so i just squirted the baby oil at him
I went to the bar without a bra on pretty sure you can go to Taco Bell drive thru with no pants
Hey can you explain why there's a dissected coconut in my purse????
I'm worried my dog collar isn't going to come in time. I might be trying on dog collars at PetSmart next week. That could get awkward.
maybe i should limp back to therapy...
oh yeah will you also bring home vodka i wanna do shots on the roof
IF THE SUNS NOT EVEN OUT THEN WHY IS HIS DICK OUT WTF
Randomize