she claims you yelled BOMBS AWAY when you came. tell me she's lying
but she didn't tell you i squeezed, built up pressure, and napalmed her face as i yelled it, did she
Is it weird I want to fuck the cartoon chick from e-surance??
so i turned around to do some reverse cowgirl when he said that this was such a better visual for him. Bad compliment or serious insult. i cant tell
i have one question about last night
if this is about your fridge being filled with hotdogs, sour cream, and PB&J open-faced sandwiches, i can explain
When I eventually hook up with a resident lets refer to it as taking a hands on approach to my job
You know we had a good night last night when today I opened up my Google Translate application and the language is set to Persian and the phrase to translate is "I want you to suck my dick".
Just had to buy plan b w/ my robotic baby from family living.. Awkward.
His grandpa picked him up. Brought him to the house. And made him clean the puke off the driveway with a broom and a bucket of water.
Currently hiding in the shower from the RA and my elbow turns it on. Showers and Ciroc don't mix..
I fell asleep while eating jimmy johns last night and then woke up at 5am and continued to eat it
You threw up with such class too! Tiara and all.
Yeah we've been texting but I don't know how to just randomly throw in sooo the real reason this is happening is because i hear you're a drug dealer
Remind me to tell you: When threeways go awry, my MLK weekend story.
Look at us. Planning our business meeting. Including snacks like shrooms & trail mix.
So I guess I walked across campus with "pat my ass" in sharpie on my forehead.
You deserve it, you colossal cock block.
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