There's a vagina buried somewhere in there.
Someone should've told Pope jumper lady and terrorist pants guy that the Worst of 2009 lists already went out....
vagina is talking i cant
who knew that a girl that let me piss on her within 20 minutes of meeting her would get upset i couldn't remember her name.
Being a slut is okay if you're being a polite slut, right?
I'm genuinely dissapointed that we didn't make any fat chicks cry
You know how girls with huge tits have back problems? Do you get knee problems or something?
Ya these assholes wanted to like sit around and eat cupcakes and watch the notebook. I was like fuck you, I want to go make some people uncomfortable in public.
It's official, I need to start putting my vagina's needs before my own.
I used to be terrified of what was under your bed until I passed out there last night. Now it just feels like home.
When were you at my house?
he threw up in a solo cup, then washed it out and used it to play flip cup. Im not sure if thats resourceful or disgusting.
My liver and my bank account can't afford another all nighter. Help.
All she has to do is text me and my dick gets hard. It doesn't matter what it's about. Last text was about a homeless dude
I danced with a french guy who licked the sweat off my neck and poured a drink on me. Not gonna lie, that shit was refreshing
He congratulated me by offering up free orgasms.. I told him I also had a birthday last month we needed to celebrate.. He was there in ten minutes.
Randomize
