Is it bad that when my prof gave examples of "stalking" behavior, I either have done or would do most of them?
gonna sleep on the stairs... to drunk to keep going up, way to drunk to go down, gonna find a comfy spot right here... its safer that way
Got hit on at a funeral service by cougar. I think I just got Reverse Will Ferrell'd.
She should get an extra 30 days for that Georgia Rule movie......terrible.
It was close. I was the girl scoping out where all the garbage cans were located in the class just in case.
This is why you don't heavily drink before 2 midterms.
You know you come from good stock when you can have a family discussion about excuses to scam pain pills from the doctors
Still not sure if my open-bar-week-long-trip to Cuba is the best idea as a congratulations-for-my-sober-february-challenge. My liver might just explode and give up.
I should be done at 8 and I've also done a great Job of convincing my self that I should get really drunk tonight
My bad man. I was at a strip club, and apparently it's like a big deal to take your phone out in one of those places.
Ok, in complete transparency, I am eating a cookie on my bed naked while reading a Halo novel.
Rather than admit to myself I've spent $756 at the bar this month, I'm just going to pretend I gave it to a homeless person...kind of makes me feel better.
I thought he was foreign, but it turns out when you're that drunk, an Ohio accent just sounds Russian.
I tried to help you up but you said "let me dance it off"
Okay first of all, that is a sick ass nickname please call me that forever. Second, i need your help.
Sorry I can't pick up... thought process is fine but too stoned to form words.
Randomize
