oh well we may not be friends on facebook but at least i got laid
Journey is playing on the radio....I think it is a sign I am going to pass my drug test
well i did feel guilty about it. until i saw how hot the guy was the next day. now, nothing but pride.
I started the year with 2,800 dollars and am now down to 83 dollars-one of which i use to snort my focalin. I have given up on food and am perplexed as to how I can make 82 dollars last more than two weekends for booze
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You tried telling the RA that girl you brought home was your mom...
my stepmom is let-the-dog-eat-out-of-her-mouth drunk. oh my god.
HE HAS A FUCKING TWIN. HE HAS A TWIN. I'M NOT DRUNK THERE IS TWO OF THEM.
Fixing to yell "you're too hot for her" at a Gerard butler look alike. There is absolutely no way this is going to end well...
Oh you know, watching its always sunny and petting his cat and NOT fucking. I'm starting my whorefree 2012 resolution early.
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She finally pulled over after almost hitting 4 cars and a semi and asked me if i was rwady i told her to let my penis to come back out
Batteries died. I don't care that you're studying for the bar. Come over. Bring the law books and study after. I'll even make coffee.
Pretty sure when I woke up the next morning we were still fucking. It just didn't stop.
I was thinking about the biological process causing me to puke while I was puking. THAT'S how much I'd been studying.
I wore a bathing suit downtown so I didn't have to put on underwear, I obviously don't have my shit together
she was sitting with her tits completely out.. on the kitchen floor..eating pickles by the handful... rapping mac dre... and then lit up a cig and continued...that drunk
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