Still at the library. i hate tax accounting so much that i've started calling it potions...
Well hey if hot cowboys are involved then all bets are off.
He puked at the bar then immediately procceded to slip in it, they loaded him up into a wheelchair, then the staff and myself walked him outside, all the while never having to pay for our tab. SO using this strategy again
He won't let me have sex with him, but feels bad if I won't let him get me off. It is the weirdest, best, most confusing pseudo relationship I've been in.
i want to find a way to basically assault his face with my vagina.
I kept reassuring him that I was easy like Sunday morning, not easy like "I've had 6 shots of tequila and haven't had sex in three months"
He said I was the "egg mcmuffin" of blowjobs. I'm flattered.
he was cumming and all I could think about was the pathway of sperm the in penis. thanks a lot nursing
That's like the cock version of a mortal kombat fatality.
Jesus christ it's been two texts and we are already talking about dildos
Model at car show < day drinking with your favorite sister. Get your head in the fucking game Christopher.
I need to stop getting picked up at 3 am by my friends parents. This is the second time this week. I'm a grown man.
Yeah totally passed out in their trash can last night.
He was all “please don’t bail because I’m missing work for this” last night
Honey no, I need dick. I’m not going to bail
hey i'm sure you are probably asleep bc you suck and think sleep is necessary to live or something?
Randomize
