She either was great at sex or I finished the whole bottle of svedka my self
i go for whatevers easier....i'm bisexual strictly due to the convenience factor
He was like a foghorn with a huge penis.
I caught him with his head in the spinach bag this morning. He was laughing demonically saying, "i love spinach, yes I do."
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Climbing through a window thats four feet off the ground isnt the easiest thing when youre high, trust me.
That's because "bed time" is my sex playlist. If you're trying to fall asleep use "nap time"
I'm not trying to alarm you guys, but I think I just swallowed a ketchup packet.
When he sent me a picture, I swear my vag frowned. That tiny.
My dating life has become some fucked up hydra of dicks; you cut one off and two pop up in its place.
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Word of advice, don't put your jar if peanut butter in the microwave, blue fire comes out
On a Thurs night I found myself drunk in a limo w 9 dudes on my way to a strip club. Once there I was handed $100 in ones and told "spend it." I need a husband. Or Jesus.
He was pretty handsy. Told me I tasted like smoke. Good think he tasted that and not the stomach acid I just puked not ten minutes before.
Ps he swallowed my earring last night so yeah
the girl next to me was drawing sonic the hedgehog on her exam what the fuck
godspeed
I'm really interested in the size of his penis so report back on that one
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