I seriously wish I was FB friends with her
conclusion of the day: americans need to get on tredmills, people need to learn how to flush toliets and learn how to pee in then instead of on them, and waiters shouldnt tell their life stories to customers.
She ordered a salad and a budweiser. I love her.
can you imagine how much money lesbians save on birth control?!?
bitches.
that was probably me. ive bitten a lot of people.
I love that my brother has just convinced my dad that smoking a blunt it an "unspoken family tradition"
I don't care how high you are, you can't finger me while eating potato chips.
I haven't seen her in ages, how is she?
Well I woke up next to her this morning so I guess I would say she could be doing better
Some people say 6pm is too early to get drunk. To them I say this dinner is delicious.
There's weed in my toothpaste. Explain.
Me and my bruised tit have to wake up at 4 AM.
I've never been this drunk around this many toddlers
I was thrusting to the beat of Felix Navidad..
Buying a new bed right now. My options are limited because I need to be able to be tied to it.
I had to pee so bad that I snuck into the bathroom while they were in the shower. At her request, he was massaging her boobs so they could grow faster. Also there was a laser light machine.
Randomize
