entire chemistry final was about beer... i actually might miss this place
He fucked my earring out of my ear. Of course he's coming over again.
Never again will we have slut saturday. Never.
What's the second line of that rhyme that starts "Vicodin before scotch...?"
I had something called a trashcan. Never again. I almost fucked chewbacca.
He licked the chalk off his shirt, then spat the Mountain Dew from his mouth onto the shirt and sucked on it. And thats him sober.
I forgot how wholesome of a place a park is when youre not drinking there.
For the amount of money I just spent on my dogs toe, I could have fucked the entire B squad at a low end strip club.
He was president of his frat and had a clap on disco ball in his room... or course I slept with him
You were great dude. You wanted to charge the guy with fedora $100 to get in.
I just want to emotionally destroy him but also find out how big his dick is so this is perfect
I never thought I could be this turned on by a man wearing racoon tails.
let me wake up, find my pants, and find out where i am tommorow and ill get back to you on that
I asked him to have birthday sex with me via xbox live
Put on your bikini and meet me at the pool \nit’s cock o’clock!
Randomize