R you on birth control?
No, why?
...no reason
She has her iPod in her ears slippers and sweats on and is walking around the house up and down the stairs getting "exercise" she just stopped for a water break
FYI I'm about to upload a vid of you to facebook of you screaming "SNACK ATTACK" and throwing cheetos at everyone playing pong...
If I sleep with another Spanish guy it is officially renamed my senor year.
You stuck your entire fist into a full jar of peanut butter and starting assaulting people
Absinthe night with my dad again, I could get used to this being home thing.
There's gotta be a lawn gnome full ecstasy around here somewhere. And by golly I will find it
I got really high and googled the history of Amish people for like an hour.
Her boyfriend caught us fucking and said "cool you're cheating too" and left.
You live a charmed life.
Besides the kids on acid... I was the highest kid there
Well five day drinking adventure in appreciation of cinco de drinko under the belt, great way to start may
I just want nice things and good sex
Girl in my public speaking class just gave a speech on weaves, God I love community college
The only person more miserably hungover from the party is the dog, and that's because he ate some balloons
Thanks so much for having me, I'm really sorry that I almost caused your dog to catch on fire and also for breaking your doorknob
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