Her dad smelled like someone lit a fart and burned their ass hairs.
the young, male pastor of my church has a jesus fish tramp-stamp. I made him show me.
Those 2 guys from the sonic commercial will be virgins for life.
I'm going to come in a little later this morning....there's no heterosexual way to say this....$1 flip flop sale at old navy
You stood next to him taking HUGE gasps of air in an attempt to second hand smoke his cig because you didn't have one...
You're a college freshman. Its your job to be pathetic. And drunk. But mostly pathetic
All I know is I want him to tie me up at least twice a week and I have an overwhelming urge to cook for him. Could this be love? I'm so confused....
I mean I sucked his dick at 3 AM... UNDERWATER. I think I have earned a follow back on twitter.
At the start of the night I was all 'come at me universe' and three hours later I was ordering an extra large pizza in bed in the dress I had gone out in. Well played universe.
Omg just opened my passenger side door and my outfit from last night is on the floorboard.
He fell backwards into a full bathtub but didn't spill a single drop of the beer in his hand. What a pro.
We need to make tonight low-budget
Is this your way of suggesting flasks?
How does one go about breaking up with their bf on vacation?
You know the sex was good when he had to ask which way was north before he left.
I apparently lifted the young child over my head yelling "Victory!" after that last game of pool, right before doing some Girls Just Wanna Have Fun karaoke.
Randomize
