the guy next to me needed a pen, so I let him take one from my book bag. my panties are now being passed around the class...thank you for telling me you hid them in my bookbag.
Nothing quite says America like barbecue and beer at 9 in the morning.
Am i fat?
Well i wouldnt let you on top
is that a crab cake on the shelf with the dvd's....?
I woke him up this morning and said I have a meeting w my advisor in an hour you need to wake up, cum on my face, and take me to my car.
Bisexual Viking-cowboy hybrid is at the bar again
Dibsssss
It was worse than that time I did shots of BBQ sauce and pierced my own ear with a thumbtack
No. I heard a cover of "my heart will go on". This is not sanity.
well I woke up with about $3 in odd change and a note that said "I'm borrowing your weed." So, no, it didn't go to well.
Yo, go checkout Kerri's Instagram quick! There's like 12 pics of her fucking some guy in a bar's bathroom. GO GO GO GO!!!!
I can't even express how horny I am. The English language isn't equipped for what I'm plotting.
11% beer and firearms, what could possibly go wrong?
You cant use biscuit as a chaser
Do I masturbate or eat a pound of matazah. Alissa help what do I do??
Will you PLEASE get your mom to stop telling me I'd make a great husband? She knows I'm gay, right?!
I know, but she really likes you. Have you met my brother yet?
Randomize