This girl is very crazy
She's one of those compassionate ppl
So everything I said on this seemingly endless date offended her
In fairness it was pretty good sex, but I still wasn't expecting the mass cheering and applause he got on leaving my tent
I'm drinking Leinenkugel through a Red Vine. I'm not drunk. I'm just happy with my life so far.
He wrote on the paper that he wanted a "Ptitty burreto" from taco bell...when we ordered it the girl paused and entered "Potatoe burrieto"....we laughed
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Am I allowed to compare getting cum'd on the face to a warm summer rain?
This is what we get for YOLOing our way to obesity
A cute girl just told me she forgot to take her birth control and winked... I've never been so conflicted about fleeing in terror
Out of curiosity, do you feel happiness for you, or sadness for ME, that you are the only one I drunk text?
You were petting your bowl of cocoa puffs and shushing it softly while staring at the mirror
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
As a friend tho, you have the biggest dick I've ever seen
I always can't wait to see you but when there's also an opportunity to get naked it elevates to an entirely different level
How is someone going to pee on the floor two days in a row? Fuck this place.
I didn’t not spend thanksgiving morning making out with him in a diner parking lot
Wine through a straw in a subway cup.....classy
is it sad that the highlight of my saturday night was waiting till 3 in the morning to hear about your saturday night?
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