your life is more of a joke than dina lohan.
if you\'re going to compare me please pick the classy one. Michael Lohan.
he puts the penis in happiness.
We shared that special kind of eye contact that can only be experienced when you know one party is saying "Oh god, I fucked him in the back seat when you were in the front, didn't I."
Just puked on the beach. Hungover. In front of my parents. I love summer.
God you better not be texting me after just having sex with someone from craigslist
i just added no after every hockey player in my phone..
Well there's nothing more unattractive them a naked, soft man crying
Oh good your over him
She tried to leave the threesome and I heard you yell "Hey! We don't quit at halftime!"
You asked me if I was judging you for being drunk, and if I can hypnotize you make sober.
Bro, you're like, my right testicle. Can't go anywhere without you.
well it can jab him in the chin so I am 100% sure he can suck his own dick
fucked a girl in the dry storage closet at work. knocked over a whole rack of tomato paste and pinto beans. and also i really hope my manager doesn't review this footage from the security camera
Hey don't blame me, picking what flavor of condom to put on my dick is a very difficult selection process
Have you ever gotten so angry that you stripped in public?
Also I feel like death. But like. In a good way
Randomize
