Just saw 2 very young girls abandon baby buggys in the Xwalk to fight. Gotta love Holyoke.
She sucked her thumb until she was 17. It's like my dick was born to be in her mouth.
would really like to know how the teddy bear got super glued to my testicles.
I Never golf you the sypdu of andrew. The one o will marry. The one j plwgded my last breath up. The one I pledged everything I live forbworh to. I love him more than life itself
He suggested abortion before I finished the sentence. That was my plan too, but now I feel like should keep it just to prove how big of a dick he is.
Did I happen to mention where i left my keys when I drunk dialed you last night
He told me he felt like he shoud say thank you and as a prize i could keep anything from his room that i wanted.
Poorly worded request for dick pic resulted in stoned beanie selfies and "lol". Miscommunication is the devil's cock block.
He is so sweet! He thanks me for sending him dirty pix. I should keep him.
Sext: Bring me pancakes from the midnight breakfast gathering please
I've reached the last of the wine in my cup so now I have to sit up in my bed to get it through the crazy straw
That isn't the worst part. It got a bazillion times more awkward when he read me a poem he wrote about his dead cat.
I need a hobby that isn't dick related
I think I’ve been affected by his dad mustache. I wanna ride it.
duddde i wasn't even home last night and someone elses clothes are on my floor and there glow sticks everywhere?!
Randomize
