i need an iv and a liver transplant
you kept slapshing your drinks on people saying the power of christ compels you.
his dad told me thanks for making his little boy a man at breakfast this morning
Well hey if hot cowboys are involved then all bets are off.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He told her, Don't talk. Just sit there so I can imagine that you have the kind of personality I wish you had.
I just canoed to the bar. I am a skilled drunk paddler.
He called it restless penis syndrome. I call it cheating.
It's gay pride weekend and Father's day.. So in honor of the occassions I am now BI
I cnant read. Cheetos goen. Help. Grt Cheetos.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
A girl told me I was her "alcohol spirit animal" tonight. Somehow I think my whole life was secretly building up to this moment
We should go, because after those margaritas time is running out on my sobriety clock.
woke up to find i out made out with his roommate before hooking up with him. breakfast was awkward to say the least
He caught a Pokemon on my head while I sucked him off. I think I need to marry him.
You were supposed to catch herpes, not feelings!!!
Sometimes you have good days, sometimes m you delete 360 screenshots off your camera roll.
Randomize