before i could say "i'm not that kind of girl", i was.
Getting up at 8 this morning to drink could be the best and the worst idea we've ever had
bailing my boss out of jail is a great way to spend memorial day
I just don't get it. Video games don't suck his dick.
When I try to close my eyes ibwant to puke. Going to the basement to watch pocohantas. That'll keep myeyes open. And puke free.
He likes bondage and spanking and shit.
Oh, so "normal" kinky not "I wanna pee on people" kinky. I can handle that.
It's a delicate game of how much porn can I look at without the other interns noticing.
PAAAANTS ARE FOR AAAASSHOLES
You couldn't even walk but you came into the kitchen with the funnel and begged me to put beer in it
Next year, please remind me not to be at a damn Super Bowl party with screaming children whose parents can't control them. I will sell the little suckers to the fucking circus passing through town.
What's the best day of the week to potentially find out you're pregnant with your ex's baby?
I'm not trying to analyze you I'm just saying you are being unfair to soup
please tell me he didn't just scream 'i am the yiff lord' at the cops
In California. Through an entire game + OT. That’s a long time to have an octopus in your pants.
Is it still sex if there's no nudity, no orgasms, but the neighbors bang on the wall and ask you to stop? I've honestly forgotten.
Randomize
