Black lace...the rest is up to ur imagination
is it bad if my mug shot looks better than my profile picture?
I woke up and there was 3 different size condom wrappers on the floor. What is this goldie locks and the 3 condoms???
Yea...but the guy who is beating me has a ponytail. So actually, I'm the winner here.
The night was doomed the minute I started taking shots with an apple as a chaser.
when i came out to my mom, it was over brunch. i was eating a banana. not exactly my smartest breakfast choice.
He asked me why my bellybutton was so ugly... and wondered why i wasnt in the mood anymore.
I dont think yelling "Grab your dicks, time for pics!" helped your case either.
Just served breakfast to a bunch of hella drunk kids. They kidnapped the birthday boy for his 21st and he was wearing a disney onesy and bunny ears. They've been drinking since before dawn, why don't we have friends like that?
dude when I get home wanna help me fulfill my dream of smoking a bowl out of my saxophone?
It's like god made him fantastic at oral to make up for what his mouth does the rest of the time.
so as he was cumming he sort of growled with one eye squinted... for a moment there I thought I was fucking Popeye
I like your optimism Chelsea but I'm not about getting my salad tossed
I made him dinner in just his cowboy hat and my boots after we did it...you should see his face :)
Come by so you can take a pregnancy test with me. It's like my monthly ritual!
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