and those juicy C cups turned out to be oddly-shaped A's when her padded bra came off.
Fact: The drinking you do in college doesn't affect your liver in real life.
my boss said she was surprised to see me this morning. i told her there's a time in a girls life she has to give up day drinking in order to make money for next weekend's alcohol. she looked so proud, i think i might get a raise.
Are you pooping in the stall next to me?
Maybe....
Cause I just heard a fart and it sounded like one of your farts.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i was calling myself "cat the lion" and tried eating the computer mouse because i thought it was "my prey"
Headed to the bar now. If I smell faintly of latex and tuna, it's just the new scent I'm trying.
One huge ass giant mistake followed by celebatory shots and coors lights thats my day in a nut shell
Maybe it's just my body's way of telling me I don't need pinky toes. Like I'm the next evolutionary leap or something...
WHAT IS PROPER BONG ETIQUETTE FOR WHEN YOU'RE ALONE IN YOUR BATHTUB AND CRYING?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I woke up with jello shots in pant pockets so I must've had fun
HE HAS CHALLENGED MY BADNESS. I MUST CONQUER ALL THAT QUESTIONS MY POWER. BRING FORTH THE TIT PICS.
The guy who was interviewing me asked if I had coke on my pants. You win this time Las Vegas
A picture of a damn cupcake brought back 3 fuckboys
There's a guy masturbating in front of Sephora right now
I was in the rappers prayer circle. Then they're blunt circle
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