i googled "where to have sex in disneyland." i found nothing.
She kept saying I was her favorite Jonas brother, and for some reason, I was ok with that.
I found her sitting in the shower having an argument with the dolphins on the shower curtain.
She has a facebook friends list called oops. theres 33 people in it. she said its all the guys she regrets fucking.
We were sitting in my backseat and he just kept biting me and telling me we weren't at the zoo...
$5 off purchases of eighths or more today only. Happy tax-free weekend. -Your consumer-minded pot dealer
The moral of the story is do not hire me because everything will end up smelling like pickles and I will not sufficiently clean it up.
Dude, did you really "knight me" and tell me I had permission to bang your sister last night?
I just figured out how I'm going to tie you to my bed. Hint: I may have to go to the auto parts store before you get here.
Just saw a man in a motorized chair roll by drinking a beer. It's 9:45 AM. I love Louisiana.
I bought a vibrating wall dildo with my tax return. You?
Don't be alarmed when we finally get naked and I let out a WOOHOO!!!
I am downtown smoking a joint with Woody Harrelson...Because our car won't start. I will be there as soon as I can.
I'm cuddly bitch. Deal with it.
Dude... this pee is not alleged
YOU SAT ON MY LAP!
Wuddup pee lap
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