I ahte it when I peed a little on my shews. I got a litll bit on the automen in your room too.:/
Tracy!! I don't have an ottoman in my room.
Ohhh....do you have a dog shaped liek un automan?
My dad just told me if I'm going to smoke pot, to make sure I use a clean needle. WTF?
i haven't been laid since the bush administration. it's frustrating.
Some advice for success: 1) Go ugly early, it saves you time and money; 2) If you can't pork a princess, pound a pig for practice; and 3) Beauty is only a light switch away.
ur like the dr phil of bizarro world.
She was drinking straight whiskey out of her peacock shaped vase again.
Her tits were the only thing that upgraded her from "no way in fuck" to "drunken mistake"
I'm soaked in beer, and I think blood. Why did we think we could tap a keg with a hammer?
He's blaming gravity for his problems right now, so put that in perspective
Between the dance party in the car and the distraction of the momma bear and two cubs im a cops wet dream roght now when comes to wreckless driving.
...i'd have to set their sheets on fire.
Do me a favor? If you get with him, please lick his abs. Someone has too they're just too beautiful not to.
I told him he was like my favorite pair of jeans; I may not wear them every day, but I'll never get rid of them and they make my ass look fantastic. Needless to say he was not thrilled.
You ate my pie without asking. So don't get butt hurt if I send you link to plus size clothing stores.
Long story short, I found someone who takes me seriously when I say I have a Shakespeare kink.
I need a hoe opinion
go on
I got the shit slapped outta me last night but the pain in my jaw doesn’t even compare to the hangover I have.
Randomize
