My brain says no but my pants say off.
You just left with that feminine looking guy you kept calling "Jessica." Just giving the heads up.
Hard to imagine a reason apart from blow jobs that I'm awake at 530 am.
She celebrated a negative pregnancy test by going out to Quizno's. I really don't understand her at all.
All I remember is apologizing to his sister for being a bad influence while I was throwing up into a big gulp cup.
I pull out like 90% of the time, but that's just to make art.
Currently shopping online for cardboard cutouts of various horror characters. That should teach me roommates to stop taking acid on Tuesdays.
It felt like Party Santa dropped by and gave us two more 18-packs.
In the middle of blowing him I looked at him and said "Your so old..." and then continued. I need to stop drinking.
Sam was like the mother fucking Moses of drunk and underage kids and he lead them to safety away from the cops. He's a hero that we deserve.
We've had gay sex and pie, the holiday season has officially begun.
Well I got black out drunk before the rehearsal dinner and berated my family with insults. But other then that it was a good time
Well I'm back. Could you fill me in on what I missed?
You don't want to know. Trust me.
finals do horrible things to a person. i haven't worn pants since friday
You kept apologizing to your car for talking behind its back
Randomize
