I realized today that I should stop thinking so much with my vagina instead of my brain.
Please tell me this doesn't mean another "surprise road trip" where I spend all my money on gas and the SURPRISE destination is the abortion clinic.
But what if I pay for the gas?
he then proceeded to tear down my curtains, wrap them around his waist, and use the rod as his "rod"... you tell me how drunk he is...
I did the seizure Bad Romance dance again last night, didn't I?
you were really good actually. your skill is increasing over time
I may have just flashed my roommate as he walked in while my towel was falling. Now he knows what an American sized penis looks like I suppose
Are you around on Saturday? Feeling a trip over
Wet with either fear or sexual excitement
I think a mixture of both is appropriate
Would it be inappropriate to rub one out in the gym shower? I mean, technically, I pay $80 a month to do what I want so could they really say anything?
Shower is fine. Steam room is shady. I've probably done both at one point in my life so I can't be used as a good reference.
My mouth feels like it's at the dentist but my body feels like it's at the strip club.
saying, "have a good fall!" After fucking a virgin boy is good etiquette, right?
If my dick was big enough to fuck the eye of a hurricane, I would.
My intervention, when it happens, should have vanilla cake....buttermilk icing.
You know I base where I go on the likelihood of me getting laid there. This includes work.
Oh the best part of having sex with him was that he made me a smoothie after
Not sure, she said after cussing out the dentist they called security. Make that the first person I know 86'ed by a dentist.
I think my liver just tried to kill me, we need to slow down
You lost to your mom AND grandma in beer pong last night. pretty sure that constitutes a retirement from the sport
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