go do what you do best...puke behind churches
Yeah no shit. My mom is giving me winecoolers as we watch a show abt alcoholics
My grandmother just explained bulimia to me as a diet
I now officially know the distance between my two boobs is one twizzler.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i googled waterboarding like you asked. as long as you do it outside. we have carpet. but i wont be a part of it.
He'll choke me during sex but he won't eat a strip of bacon. Vegetarians are weird.
I just want uncharted vagina. Fresh and ripe.
She kept saying the tortilla understood her. I honestly don't know where she found a tortilla at the pool.
Going out so taking the 2nd 1/2 of beer w/ me ont'tube in a Pringles tube. I give money to people on the street that have more self respect.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You screamed "There's a potato in my anus" and proceeded to attempt to grind with the bouncer. Also, I'm pretty sure our Chem teacher was in the same bar as us.
Made it just outside my dorm and yack on the front dirt. Wave to a dad thats staring, continue on my way.
Who knew wearing a toga outside would provide for and infinite amount of dick to choose fron
Also this time, I didn't have a random creepy guy come up from behind me, grab my junk, and whisper "where's the cocaine?" in my ear. So that's also a win.
You were so drunk you told some dude your life story in one short sentence... and kissed his fiancé. You're invited to the wedding.
I'm not going to waste the next hour of my life writing a diplomatic email explaining that she's bitch. I have Parks and Rec to watch.
Randomize