so i never found you. but i found vodka. so its kinda the same
I'd be surprised if he had a problem with boundaries after helicoptering his penis in front of you
I just opened a bottle of wine with a shoe and a tube of mascara. Get on my level
I put bits of fruit cocktail in the jello shots i made because i knew that they were gonna be the only thing we ate all day
Can't a girl send out a 4 pm booty call anymore
Convinced lucas all the eggs in the fridge are fertilized and now he's crying.
Woke up to a sex noise notice under my door...he gets a A+ for proformance and ill be seeing him again.
i want to have his babies. i NEED to. shit i wont even ask for child support, he's that goodlooking.
i found you in bed eating fish fillets dipped in chocolate pudding
I feel like your dick pick is everywhere. Never have I needed to be so careful when posting pictures.
We had sex on roll out bean bag chair, and then proceeded to sleep with a blanket with dolphins on it. Happy birthday to me.
When do you sleep by the way. I was surprised when I went to work at 1 am,left at 7 am and had a text from you somewhere in between
I just vodka nap now...
I AM EATING BACON AND CHEESE. FUCK THE BULLSHIT.
In all the years we have had drunk sex, have we ever done it in a bed?
God... We're terrible. I'm so proud of us.
I know! It makes me feel all warm inside. Or maybe that's just me getting closer to hell.
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