There's a 34yo winking at me. Why do i find this weird when my bf is a 38yo married man?
i passed out on the floor in my hallway and woke up with my dog licking himself 2 inches from my face. my first reaction? envy
I'm gonna write a book, Things that go bump in the night: The story of Katelyn. Chapter one, my roommate is a dumb whore.
Okay you totally passed out. Ask me about the bike parking garage and the expired baby formula in the morning.
Well, technically I had a shirt on, it was just around my waist.
she said "the two best ways to sober up are to nurse someone or give a blowjob" and im gonna go along with it.
Haha! I've never met his girlfriend, so my main focus will be not saying,"you're the only person in this room that doesn't know what my vagina feels like."
Oh I see how it is...you can snap chat the world your balls but I wear dinosaur feetie pajamas and I'm the "weird one"
You've seen the quality of dick pics I normally get. The bar is high.
I feel like I have a very capable uterus.
He got in a fight. Then called me drunk to see if he should bail his friends out, or walk through a Taco Bell drive-thru. True love.
Dude she's from Moscow. I feel like I'm cheating on America.
Overheard a drunk girl talk about how when she's drunk she believes in more than one God
This pedicure right now is the most physical I've been with a guy all month
momentary stint on a second floor library computer...guy next to me snorted blue adderall off his notebook through a cut straw, i cant tell if this guy is my hero or just plain crazy...
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