He just said "I made some changes in my life. The male g-spot is in the rectum and I wanted to explore that."
I just googled "buy xanax online". What is wrong with my life?
i just realized the only form of arm exercise i get is holding my arms up in the stand up tanning booth
i was told that i was found face down in a plate of ketchup at the dinner table
I told her she has a very organized vagina; somehow she took offense.
Just heard an advertisement for 40 proof chocolate milk. We may never have to grow up
i just feel like it would be irresponsible for you to not have sex with me again.
My vagina agrees.
I need to stop going to bars and yelling "I could be teaching your kids one day, bitches!"
Good morning! So would you prefer me to show up kind of late or on time but looking like I got chewed up and spat out by an episode of Buffy the Vampire Slayer?
Sloppy and selfish. Your 27 and you don't know where my clit is? BYEEE
well it was great until i saw his anime body pillow
somehow getting chased by a bulldozer was NOT on my to-do list for today. just saying
This friendship isnt goin to work if you dont respond to my drunk texts
Did you happen to find the other half of my bra last night?
If he brings home bacon, dont let him leave. Dont screw this one up. this may be our last chance.
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