Tell me exactly where it said it wasn't a unisex bathroom.
just caught grandpa beating off in the living room
maybe touching the ground while going 70 wasn't such a great idea after all..
I realized i make the same noise when i get a blow job as when i eat pizza
the girls im babysitting are trying to see how much jello they can swallow without chewing...their future boyfriends are lucky
Do you recall us playing flip cup on your head?
The fire breather is here so I may get my second wind.
He's basically like a fancy dildo that buys me dinner.
You wanted to go find him and we told you to sit down cause you kept stumbling. You yelled " I CAN STAND!! It's the walking part I can't figure out!"
Where the fuck are you? I just got punched in the nose by a tourist
Just an fyi, you also tried to wrangle a peacock last night.
This is not a test of the emergency warning system. He has broken my vagina. I repeat he has broken my vagina. Damn it was good.
I just took like 30 condoms from the doctors office... no one can say I don't try to save my money.
Does sending her to the conference instead of a competent employee and putting her in a suite make up for banging her husband behind her back?
No, but she’ll have a nice memory when she gets dumped and fired on the same day.
He has to be employed and covid free. That’s my standard. I can’t be picky. 2020 has killed my sex life.
Randomize
