So I just went to student health services and on my way in there was a girl outside on her phone saying "I just dont want you to be angry" and on my way out she was saying "I have the side effects sheet right here" Someone started the semester off classy
the awesomeness of being snowed in wore off after we ran out of beer and we realized we really didnt want to be stuck with everyone.
i have to go- we're throwing the dummy from the balcony again
I just found my coat check number in my underwear.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Make sure you take the apple pie out of your pocket before you pass out.
sooo what's the appropriate music to listen to after you find out the dude you been fucking, is legit married with kids...what genre is that?
His rebound girl is half his size, looks like a leprechaun, is majoring in theater studies and has arms like Rosie O'donnell. Do I win?
So my dad just walked in on me with the same girl twice in 3 nights. I told him if he wants to see her tits to adleast admit it. All he did was smirk.
I need a present that says please like me even though i'm banging your grandson
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You guys had reggaeton music playing while dry humping? Definition of romance.
Do you think there are other mothers looking at porn in the carpool line?
Double check your contract and see if it says anything about sleeping with your manager
He got punched in the face last night? By who? I’ll invite him to our formal. Seriously.
It may be a clusterfuck, but I'll be looking classy as shit as I watch the nightmare unfold
the cop said "drunk and disorderly" like it was a bad thing
Randomize