she calls it her "sourpuss" because everyone makes that face when they see it.
I told them you could toss a salad like wolfgang puck
he drunkenly pissed himself on the deck, in the bathroom, and on my couch within the span of an hour
its like an avodart commercial...maybe he has a growing problem
I rode on his Vespa around Florence and fucked him in an empty train. It was like a way sluttier version of Lizzy McGuire
Can we dedicate this weekends marathon sexcapades to all the haters?
I'm ultimately at thr Shariton to drink and ppssibly puke on fancy shit. Thats my story and Im sticking to it.
If you were curious as to how many pounds of bagged marijuana can fit in the trunk of a 2010 Chevrolet Aveo, we now have the answer
She gave me a handjob at the dinner table while her dad was carving the turkey. I made eye contact with him. Im pretty sure he knew.
What are you talking about?! I shot gunned a monster while simaltaneously blowing gym boy Todd. If I'm not the poster child for being well rounded and versatile I have no idea what NYU is looking for
i did nothiing wrong other than not tell that kid his whole back was covered in puke
I think I may be the only girl in the world that can say she has fallen asleep grasping a penis..... 3 different times...... 3 different penises
So the doorbell rang while we were banging, and I'm pretty sure the pizza man saw my dick. But hey, we got pizza.
Weird thing is that's not the first time I've been felt up by a Santa. Happens every year
It's a shame, really, because he's got the cock of a horse... And the personality of dry toast.
just showered sitting down cuz standing seemed like too much work, thursdays need to stop making me their bitch.
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