Guys who wear capris make me want to kill endangered species.
can you explain to me why you commented on every one of my profile pics with "tits and beer ftw" please and thank you.
she was handing out condoms w/ her number on them...
They both just did a shot, head butted each other, did another shot and then slapped each other in the face. These could be the two guys we've been looking for all our lives
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
IDK who she called, but some guy came into the party, flying drop kicked Joe said never again. She has to invite him around again.
I'm in the room..It's full of lost souls and sadness. I can taste the salt of their tears. This final might take a few freshman today..
I don't want to tell anyone! People who sleep with senators either end up in porn or guantanamo
He won't let me go to the bars unless I can manage to get flip flops on.
Sounds like he's doing this for your own good...
She wants to go as a facebook "like" for halloween, but right now her costume looks more like the hamburger helper hand with broken fingers.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Also, sex on a first date is no, right? Really, I just don't want to clean my apartment, but I'm trying to hide behind "morals" in an effort to appear less lazy.
Do you think they'll deliver pizza to my mouth
I just feel like I'm worth a little bit more than your recycled nudes...
I was mad at him...then I jerked off. Now I'm over it. Orgasms fix everything, I swear.
It's scary that my vibrator is a dangerous weapon. I want a new one.
Went to waffle house after dropping my sister off at school and got into a heated argument with a drunk/hungover philosophy professor I will not name. I won the argument.
Randomize