her teeth looked like a whores toenails, i was too horrified to
when i told him i was pregnant with his baby he texted me 'congradulations'
i pity the fetus.
i just watched a video of two girls fucking with a banana and i thought of you.
i hate you
Just so we both are on the same page, I have no solid plans as to where I'll be sleeping tonight.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
bio was interesting today. swabbed my mouth to see what the cells where, ha. found a sperm cell. he was just that awesome
I'm thinking I had intended to send you pics cuz I woke up naked
turkey basters and jungle juice, is that really the whole shopping list for new year's?
HOW DID YOU END UP IN THE BATHROOM WITH A DANCER AFTER 12 MINUTES?
I need a Xanax. A Veggie Delight. And exhibition style sex.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
If you've ever wanted to get filthy in a Catholic church before 2 on a Wednesday, I might be your guy.
I no longer exist. I have transformed into a puddle of sex.
there’s plenty of nice guys out there with good jobs and NO felonies!
My mom wants to name our new dog the same name as my fuck buddy. This will be weird
so I think we need to change lawn care services...the guy woke me up by the pool while I was naked...told me he already picked up all the beer cans for us and gave me his number for the next time we party...
Act your age.
I am. I'm acting like a drunk 20 year old.
Randomize