And mexicans. My burrito likes you.
i went to throw her on my bed and threw her straight in to my bike
this morning he rolled over looked at me and said "oooo, you look like i need a drink" and then put on his clothes and left without another word
i saw his dick when we were four, so thats kind of ruined for me now
You had already cockblocked me. The cops were just an assist.
After he told me that it's up to him to carry on his family name, I almost felt bad for not letting him cum inside me.
Cops do not care. One just laughed and said "precious"
I don't think he knows what shame means anymore. He gave some bar slut his sisters Tiffanys necklace, in exchange for anal.
Legitimate logistical question....how did you pee in your duct tape dress?
I'm just planning on experiencing Disney as adult style as it gets. Drinking bloody mary's at dawn and telling all the kids waiting in lines how badly their future sucks and that Santa isn't real.
You came home with a traffic cone and said, "this is my birthday condom."
We were so drunk that when I broke the bottom off a pint glass we decided to make it into a candle holder. How does that happen?!
I totally intended to come to the hotel, but I woke up in a parking lot
The struggle is real.
HIS NAME IN MY PHONE IS JOSHUA DREAMCHASER I CAN NOT
NO SHAME NOVEMBER
Did you just email Kelly and I gay dinosaur erotica?
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