How fat would you say she has to be before I can consider this a threesome
Did yall have sex?
Well we both woke up naked and there was a condom wrapper on the floor, but I don't remember so does that count?
Def not... that's how I managed to keep my number under 10 for all of college- If you don't remember, it didn't happen
Milquetoast, coolest word ever.
All the walks of shame were condensed into the hour before parents started showing up. Move out day is so bittersweet
I just blew my nose and little bits of weed came out.
I feel like everytime I call him he's either fucking or getting into trouble. It's really disturbing that he presses the answer button and then proceeds to fuck her harder.
I made a list on my phone of places I want to fuck, it's right under my list of groceries I'm getting a little too used to regular sex but dude monogamy is the shit
I won't apologize to a one balled man
She literally just changed his birthday. Overly attached girlfriend has nothing on her.
Cleaning my pipe and using the left over resin solution to make THC laced rolling papers and a jar of hash oil/honey for my tea
WE USE THE WHOLE BUFFALO
He hasn't touched a vagina in two and a half years. THIS IS WAY TOO MUCH PRESSURE TO BE UNDER
I was telling everyone at the frat that they had to try the "fantastic refreshment" that was everclear, vodka and country time
call me with an emergency in 5 min. This chick has a strap on hangin behind the bathroom door.
Oh god establish a safe word
I'm going to! Pineapple.
I gave him one of my famous hand jobs.
Randomize
