I think men at large are the problem in most or all relationships. It's like trying to drag a three-legged retarded puppy through an obstacle course
Retelling stories from our semester makes me realize we need to get tested for herpes.
Put it this way, at one point I was getting stoned on the roof of the strip club with one of the strippers while another one gave me a free lap dance. That wasn't even the best part of the night.
Here's the thing, you got road head in two different cars tonight. You feel lucky yet?
Colombian exchange intern from my Mom's friend's ranch loves me, and is staying the night because we got each other drunk. Successful Christmas? I think yes.
She had her pubic hair down there shaved into the superman s............. Best one night stand ever.
Please hurry. I'm the only one here who's not an attorney with a trophy wife.
Got to use the phrase "sweet pukas dude." My day is made.
Why does everyone always assume I'm fucking their boyfriends?
You are fucking her boyfriend.
Let's make this a nightly thing. You'll explain the Watergate scandal like you're telling me a bedtime story while I eat popcorn high as fuck
Was not aware that standing loudly up off the couch and loudly, drunkenly slurring "I'M EIGHTEEN NOW BITCHES" counted as a primitive mating call.
I dont think you understand. A NOODLE FELL OUT OF MY VAGINA! I DEMAND TO KNOW WHAT YOU DID TO ME LAST NIGHT!
Want to have dinner and we can talk about how my vagina can make you feel better?
he offered to let me fuck his brother , of course im marrying him
youll appreciate my drinking habit one day...
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