Ok so serious question: if one wanted to say the plural of mongoose, would it be mongooses or mongeese?
ii just google-imaged 'sad turtle' and maggie gyllenhaal only came up once. what is the world coming to?
Note to self: when drunk try to remember that ctrl, alt and dance doesnt exist on a keyboard.
She asked me why I was wearing a Batman Suit. Have I ever needed a reason to wear a Batman Suit?
I'm coming over to use your dick. I need to take my aggression out on something. Hope that's cool.
may have given a homeless man 70 dollars in exchange for his sandals. so yea, i'm going as jesus for next halloween.
I want her autograph on my taint
I am downstairs in the bar now having a beer...actually I ordered two beers and placed one across from me in front of an open chair. I did this for appearance sake, so nobody knew I was double fisting all alone. I'm getting hungry now. I'm thinking of ordering two meals just to keep appearances up.
You sucked a guys dick who's name was Chad and that wasn't a sign that it was a bad idea?!
well you don't shave your pubes into a handlebar mustache and keep the party to yourself
He couldn't get his dick hard. So he started yelling at it. " EVERYONE is laughing at you, you piece of shit no wonder you can't get pussy" i wonder if that happens frequently I'll try again next weekend
Just whisper "I fucked your boyfriend" in her ear and be done with it.
Sorry again for almost setting you on fire.
before i could order beers she was on stage 69ing with a stripper
its Niagara falls. its like international waters. You can get away with anything there
Randomize