Some girl just toasted to friendship and love. I want to break her neck.
you got kicked out last night because right after you said "whats up?" to us, you downed your whole vodka ton and threw it across the bar.
i keep myself tagged when other girls look bad/ugly so i look better
dont ever smoke after you drink again... i dont think ive ever seen...or heard of someone throwing up and farting at the same time. that is, if you were farting.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
They had miseltoe over the keg.... thats cheating
Whats the count minus fat chicks?
He blow dried my hair while I sucked his dick. Now THAT'S fucking teamwork.
I hijacked a bellboy cart and rolled into the party dancing on it
Apparently you need a permit for a flamethrower.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm 50% weirded out and 50% into it
Saw my drug dealer at Easter mass with his family so that was weird
So...#1 on my TO DO list for college is to fuck someone somewhere in the stadium during the homecoming game...you down?
Have you ever woken up and said a thank you prayer to the beer gods for allowing you to wake up in the morning and still have the ability to walk and talk? Because we should.
So he apologized for peeing on my floor.. then we fucked all night.
Real classy
I just got fed by 3 guys. I love my job.
Randomize