He woke up, got my bottle of water and poured it on me and then went back to sleep. Not really how I want to wake up at 2 a.m.
There are work activities and non work activities and dunking my head in a bucket of ice water pulling it out and shotguning a beer is certainly not a work activity
My vagina would be awesome. I would be the most popular girl in the village.
Sorry but i am wayy to hungover to take mom to her AA meeting.
Wont she be proud, Hailey.
He gave me a trycicle he stole from a kid as an "offering" to have sex. I couldnt say no when he went through all that.
I think i just fucked the same guy a second time without realizing it....does that make me a good whore or a bad whore???
Best part of having a window in your office is that you can leave through it when you shit your pants at work.
I'm assuming the reason my elbow is so sore has something to do with all the broken shot glasses eh?
Yep
If I learned anything from that one time I saw the last 10 minutes of oprah when they talked about the secret, it is that you project what you receive back. I also have wine.
Dude you spoke to a girl about CRICKET. She MUST want sex
When the hubs wants to wear his training mask during sex and pretend to be Bane you just go with it.
Yeah, I probably need some combination of electric shock, massive quantities of LSD, and enough couch time time to make Woody Allen say "Enough".
If it exists, I've probably pregamed it.
You know I base where I go on the likelihood of me getting laid there. This includes work.
It's wednesday. OF COURSE HE'S DRUNK.
Randomize
