Whats contracted in vegas does not stay in vegas....
Im watching hello kitty on qvc debating if its a good idea to cook bagel bites on my space heater
now I regret adding my aunt on facebook. she remnded me today on my wall about the importance of checking my stools for blood since I have diaherria.
it was 6 in the morning, and you cried until i put mulan in. then you proceeded to say every word, not to mention sing along... stop drinking.
Just drove through Taco Johns wearing a drug rug and no pants. When I rolled down my window, the girl paused for a minute before saying "um... 4.07"
he made a bald eagle out of coke lines
You know it is an interesting night when the 911 operator calls you
It's gonna be one of those someone is getting divorced parties
I seriously had to check my phone this morning to make sure I didn't agree to any strange sexual favors.
its one thing to be single and another thing to be single and then have your profile picture be of you and the cat
your picture is with misty too!!
I AM SINGLE BY CHOICE
Gonna be hard to top last New Year's Eve when the guy I blew came at midnight
Timehop reminded me that 4 years ago today I helped a one armed man do the YMCA by being his other arm.
It was a tough decision either lay in bed or go to work and lay in the stockroom
So if my boyfriend and I hooked up with the same girl it’s not like I cheated. It’s communal.
thanks for the bj man. also make sure you close the gate behind you. the chickens are out.
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