Ha. No worries! So loud here &god I love drag queens! How does it happen, the congealing?
First rule of pills: If you can't remember what it is, take half.
I am like the Mr. Miyagi of queefs.
Exactly how many bongs can i have before my parents figure out they really aren't vases
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The best part of tonight is drunk commenting on my moms pic about how birds just want to give you diseases and pluck out your eyes
I'm doing the Macarena naked in my living room right now
I see you're taking unemployment seriously.
Tonight, a friend walked in and said "oh look at that. Drunk on the living room floor. Just as expected." this is my life. This is my life.
She just mixed her Emergen-C with champagne... Vegas here we come!
All he did was like my Instagram picture and I'm already planning how to turn down sex with him this weekend...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Was there a condom involved? Because he was saying he wanted a kid. Repeatedly.
Ive only just recently decided that NOT fucking you would be best for both of us.
My boyfriend's brother just got out of jail and he is already telling us to steal cable. Dude.
It was great. Somehow, sleeping with her sister cured everything!
mate iv just woke up in the garden. either help me inside or bring out my vodka
I just wanna go home jackoff, eat chicken fingers, drink beer, play halo and go to bed. I'm sick of this shitty school, the shitty kids and having to fucking teach them.
Randomize