Just FYI I rubbed poison oak on all your sheets and blankets so we all will know who you hooked up with (in about a day)
fighting downstairs. join me tonight to hear their makeup sex. also, let's make skittles vodka.
then my best friend's brother, boyfriend, and future bro in law showed up at the bar. they asked who i was there with. didn't know if "a 40 year old man" or "my 5th grade teacher" was better answer.
Just looking for some anal play. An attempting to read atonement. The highbrow/lowbrow divide is striking.
I'm doing it for my vagina. You should understand that
Slurping strawberries throug a straw. It feels like the kool-aid man is coming in my mouth.
I decided that Calgary can keep my underwear. They earned it.
It's annoying. I only date people who are 6 foot 3, drug dealers, or 2 years older than me.
Atlanta road trip update. Jimmy fell into the petting tank at the aquarium. And freaked out. With cops now... Keep you posted
....I feel like you are deciding whether or not I'm good enough for you based on what I ordered from Chipotle.
I either have a razor blade lodged in my throat or I've been drinking entirely too much Evan Williams.
I just hope I don't wheeze during sex
nm just hungover. watching movies and roasting marshmallows in bed, over a candle to avoid life
I wanted to write an apology letter to my vagina after that.
i look like i'm walk-of-shaming but i'm really showered and re-clothed and rallying. i fool everyone
Randomize
