the only girl from my high schools graduating class coming to our school next year went stag to prom and still has braces...
dibs.
I understand. Hypothetically what should one do after throwing up in the shower?
I made him go down on me for 40 mins then pretended to pass out. I swear, I'm like a boy.
He has in a pan: ten pieces of bacon, two cloves of garlic, an egg (not scrambled or hard boiled, just an egg) and frozen corn.
So mom called me from the hospital laughing her ass off. Apparently my sister is allergic to cocaine...
Post walk of shame: realized the underwear I put on when I left was another girl's underwear.... woof
No one's ever called me intergalactic cocksucker, before.
What does it say about me that I feel completely charmed right now?
just woke up on my patio with a mouse eating cheetos off mys chest. youre all assholes.
Stripping out of my teacher clothes to Talk Dirty to Me. Who let me become a teacher?
Is that your mom climbing in your window dude
It was rocky mountain showdown of course we got shitfaced and talked about eating buffaloes
You look wasted in ALL of the pictures I just saw you in.
That can't be good for your liver!
Thanks for caring mom.
I woke up with leftover chocolate syrup on my nipples. WTF happened last night??
That was the first time i’ve been physically intimidated by a LinkedIn profile.
Be there in 6 mins I’m smell like fireball. and strippers and need to use your showers before go home
Randomize
