There comes a time in every man's life where he has to shit in a catbox to prove a point.
our school mascot just walked into class and threw condoms everywhere. welcome to college
I gave up sex for lent.
I guess that means I'm postponing our date until after Easter.
They sext over her pic comments. Role playing as wolves.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
if all that ever happens for the rest of forever is drinking wine and eating popcorn, ill be okay
Alright whatever you say... But in the future when you really wish you had a dildo don't come crying to me about it.
We let him drunkenly pack his own bags without checking them. Yet no one was surprised when the TSA girl pulled a 12 pack out of his carry on.
Why don't you throw your vagina at it and see what happens?
I should rephrase... I'm trying to not sit on other peoples faces besides my boyfriends.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Love these next 4 months. Wake up from a college football hangover and get to put your hand down your pants and watch NFL football all day.
his daughter has his phone and goesss ohhh boobies and shows me a picture of my own tits...
You, me, naked, mistletoe, fifth of jack, gallon of lube, condoms, Cheetos, handcuffs, rope, along with no morals, inhibition or judgment. That's all I want for Christmas.
dude, I felt like being high in a Santa hat and eating five boxes of cookies was right for today.
Yeah you were fine except for when you peed under the bar
my very deepest apologies for the unintentional cock block.
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